


Don't bring a wand to a gun fight

by vamprav



Series: All the Crack [5]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: BAMF Lily Evans Potter, Crack, For reasons, Gen, Lily is a parcelmouth, Lily is having none of your shit, Podfic Welcome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-25
Updated: 2018-11-25
Packaged: 2019-08-29 10:17:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16742137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vamprav/pseuds/vamprav
Summary: Lily was muggle first and James was a genius at transfiguration. So the last line of defense is a little less magical and a little more muggle.





	Don't bring a wand to a gun fight

**Author's Note:**

> I was kind of sick of all the Lily Potter was dainty bull shit and got sent down a momma bear rabbit hole. Also I just kind of got fed up with the fact that Lily forgot all of her muggle roots when she went witch, transfiguration can be used so much more efficiently when you just but your mind to it.

Lily heard his feet on the stairs, a faint creaking that drives tension up her spine like nothing else ever has. She toke a deep breath and let it out ever so slowly in an attempt to calm her heartbeat. Harry was deathly quiet behind her, green eyes almost glowing in the darkness.

"You've lost, little girl," he called out as he reached the top step and Lily's hand's tighten reflexively around what she had cupped between her palms.

She didn't reply as her brain began to fade into the clear whiteness of instinct left unchecked. The stairs were ten steps away and she heard every foot fall as his boots struck wood. The doorknob turned ever so slowly and she raised what she held in her hands as it did.

He pushed the door open, the grin he wore melting into a look of utter shock as he sees what she'd holding. The angry hiss that passed between his teeth made her grin in satisfaction.

Then, Lily very calmly pulled back the hammer of her gun and shot Voldemort in the chest five times at point blank range. He hit the ground like a sack of potatoes and Lily let out a sigh of relief as she lowered the gun with shaking hands.

Harry made a little bleeping sound from behind her that mad her giggle and she peered down into his crib to make sure the noise canceling earmuffs she'd put on him where still in place. They were and Harry didn't appear to be in any sort of distress so Lily left him to snuggle his stuffed wolf.

She walked over to stand over Voldemort's still breathing corpse, smiled down at him before hissing sweetly, " _I'm a mother first you dick,_ " and shot him twice in the head.

Carefully she kicked his wand away from his hand and crushed it under the heel of her dragon hide boot. It cracked right down the center and oozed a mixture of black, foul smelling puss.

She went back to standing guard over Harry's crib as he slept, nerve still thoroughly on and when Severus Fucking Snape came running off the stairs crying her name she shot him in the head too.


End file.
